Send in the Fans
by incurelf
Summary: Fanfiction, the way to fix everything that went wrong (namely, FIN). My solution to the tradegy that was FIN...in which Ares gets a little help from the fans...


Now, I've been thinking. We all hated the end of FIN, right? Duh. So I'm changing it, because fanfiction is oh-so-wonderful, and...you'll see.  
  
(((^^^ ^^^))) SPOILERS (((^^^ ^^^)))  
  
FOUNTAIN OF STRENGTH scene: Akemi's spirit is talking to Xena, Gab is getting the pot of ashes.  
  
From far away Greece, Ares was watching the scene, worried. As a god, he could have, of course, gone and taken Xena (and maybe Gab too if he was in the mood) away from 'Japa', as they say. But he really, REALLY didn't want to upset the Japanese gods. So he had another idea...  
  
About 30 seconds later, 500 Xenites were gathered in Mount Olympus. Nearly all were girls, though some were guys, and a few of the girls were in home made Xena outfits. *twitch* Some of them were looking at the god with awed expressions, some with confusion, and some with disgust. "But you're dead!" someone yelled. "Aren't you?" a few people glared at the speaker. Ares looked annoyed.  
  
"No, I was never dead, I lost my godhood, ok?!"  
  
"Wait...you're actually ARES?" someone gasped.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Wow."  
  
"Can I tell you why you're here now? Good." And Ares proceeded to explain what he wanted them to do. Everyone agreed eagerly, and they vanished in a sparkle of blue light.  
  
They reappeared on Mt. Fujisan. Gabrielle was about to put the ashes in the Fountain, Xena was about to stop her, and, for the sake of this story, Akemi was around. Maybe she wanted to make sure Xena joined her...  
  
"Alright!" said one Xenite, a tall redhead. "75 of you hold Akemi! Don't kill her, hold her captive! The next 25, crowd around Gab, separate her from Xena. The other 400, we'll attack Xena. Be tough, be strong, and remember everything you learned while watching! Go!"  
  
The mass of Xenites split off into 3 groups. The first group leapt on Akemi, who looked alarmed at this sudden onslaught and had no chance to change shape or put the pinch on anyone. Gleefully the Xenites held her down while she struggled and called Xena's name.  
  
Another 25 made a ring around Gabrielle, chanting for her to put the ashes in. Gabrielle looked a bit weirded out, and glanced at Xena, who was buried under a mass of screaming Xenites. She shrugged - even in spirit form, she was sure Xena could handle a couple hundred girls, and turned back the Fountain. The chanting grew louder.  
  
"Will you shut up?" she said at last. "It's got to be dramatic!"  
  
"Screw drama!" yelled the redhead, and grabbed the urn. "BRING XENA BACK!" and with that, she emptied the urn into the Fountain. As Xena felt herself coming back to life, she exploded out of the mass of Xenites with a piercing "AYI-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI!" and looked disgruntled.  
  
"You weren't supposed to bring me back to life, Gabrielle. Not that I mind, but..."  
  
"What, that 40,000 souls need you to die and stay dead? Oh, that's not true, that's a lie Akemi told you so you would stay with her forever. One of them told me." Gabrielle inclined her head towards the ring of Xenites who were surrounding Akemi, trying to decide how to kill her. "Besides...did you really want to be dead?"  
  
"Well, no," Xena admitted. "But..."  
  
"Come on, then. But from now on, I refuse to go further east than India."  
  
"Fine."  
  
OR another way to do it would be...  
  
The 500 fans clustered around Xena as Gabrielle prepared to resurrect Xena. A Xenite with black hair and blue colour-contacts stepped forward and whispered in Xena's ear.  
  
"What, I have to CHOOSE?" Xena yelped. She had never considered THIS perspective on it. The Xenites grinned evilly and moved in closer.  
  
"You have to decide, Xena," a blonde boy warned.  
  
"Yep. It's your decision...sex or souls," said a short girl with long brown hair. "Which one do you choose?"  
  
Xena looked troubled. "But...but..."  
  
"CHOOSE!" they roared. Xena winced. The Persian Army she could deal with, but a mass of obsessed fans was more than the Warrior Princess had ever dealt with.  
  
"Sex or souls, sex or souls..."  
  
"It's not THAT hard of a decision!" someone called.  
  
"Hurry up!" someone else yelled.  
  
"Gabby or little white octopus things!" the redheaded leader said impatiently. "Take your pick. But there will be serious consequences for the latter..."  
  
Xena glanced over at Yodoshi's body, where a couple of stray souls made their way out. Then she glanced at Gabby.  
  
"Alright! Alright!" she threw up her hands. "Do it, Gabrielle! NOW!"  
  
Gleefully, Gabrielle dumped the ashes into the Fountain...and Xena lived. 


End file.
